a little sour

Ok i need a little time to rant 

then i will go back to calmness and maturity

 (as if i have ever been calm or mature)

but whatever.

I don't really like posting about things that make me mad

because i feel it just gets me more upset, but honestly

if i don't let it out here some people are going to get 

HURT,

so really im being very kind by doing this.

Firstly,

Please stop blaming me for everything.  I know that i am extremely
 accident prone and clumsy and that IN THE PAST i have caused

some damage to things, but please note that that was the PAST 
i am 17 years old now i still break things and mess things up, but I

am so much more careful now and i make way less mistakes

and whenever something goes missing, or gets broken, or

is moved from its perfect place please do not assume its

me. There are like 945824985 people that could have done it 
or maybe, just maybe it was YOU.

IM 17!

give me the chance to be a big girl cause i don't know if you've noticed

but im growing up.


Next,
Could you please be kind? Why do you feel the never ending need
to bring sarcasm and rudeness into our relationship? I adore you, I
want to spend as much time with you as I can, you are wonderful, but
you are a jerk. You are SO much better than you have ever been, and I
do give you serious props for that, but come now. You are an adult! Its
time you leave that old person behind.
I want to be able to tell you everything, to pour my heart out to you, and trust that you will give me sensible advice, teach me from your mistakes, and keep
me grounded, but i also want to trust that you will do it with patience and love.


NEXT,
Sometimes there are reasons i don't tell you every little thing thats going on
in my life.I know this sounds really cliche, but i am a teenager. I don't always want you
all up in my buisness about everything. I don't want to hear your awkward remarks
on the people im hanging out with or the boys you THINK i'm interested in.
Honestly you have no idea whats going on, and you just embarress me.
If you really want to know whats going on wait for me to come and talk
to you , because i will. I appreciate that you are interested in knowing whats
going on in my life. That shows me that you love and care about me, but you have
also told me that you trust me, so let me make some mistakes, let me live my life, and let
me have a little privacy.
and please please PLEASE stop following me around when i have friends
over, and trying to show off to them, and make them think you are cool.
Let me tell them that, because i think and talk about how great you are all the time


Next,
Grow up and take some responsibilty for your life. You have turned into
such a lazy and selfish person. I know inside you, you really aren't
but your actions speak so loud that it covers up the goodness
i know is inside you. 
Oh and please be quiet
You are SO loud, all the time. You are hilarious and i love that, but sometimes
i just need a little peace.
And turn of the dang TV/computer/ds/wii
TURN IT OFF
cause your brain is turning to mush.


Next,
I know things are crazy for you right now, but im still here
waiting to see if you still care about me at all.
You say it, but i don't see it  Have we really changed that much?
Have are lives taken two different paths? Are we just too different now?
I can definitely feel the age difference, i feel like your more like a little
sister than a best friend.


Finally,
Gosh darn it. Why do i want to be with you so bad?
We are so different, but whenever im not with you, all i want
is to be with you again. Sometimes you leave me dancing around the
room, and other times you leave me broken and confused on the floor.
What are you thinking? Can you just let me into your head for like
a minute? Thats all i would need so I could know im not wasting my time.
please?

is that too much to ask?